Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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