Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
my nose is crying tears of wow.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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