I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize