Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
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