i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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