after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize