Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  i was rollin on her like bob the builder

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (318): i was rollin on her like bob the builder http://tfl.nu/6lwa
  Replies (3) Good night (2460) Bad night (611)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken http://tfl.nu/k7ra
  Replies (20) Good night (686) Bad night (3502)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it. http://tfl.nu/g1hs
  Replies (5) Good night (5603) Bad night (680)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german. http://tfl.nu/cfoz
  Replies (18) Good night (6824) Bad night (892)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was. http://tfl.nu/3v3c
  Replies (17) Good night (1490) Bad night (3618)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents. http://tfl.nu/vupc
  Replies (17) Good night (2759) Bad night (1039)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear http://tfl.nu/8b8t
  Replies (5) Good night (1377) Bad night (674)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?

  (1-850): View more from Florida

  It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (850): My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans? (1-850): It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it? http://tfl.nu/e1h9
  Replies (5) Good night (1931) Bad night (1359)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?! http://tfl.nu/j8i6
  Replies (9) Good night (2158) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (682): He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl http://tfl.nu/krho
  Replies (2) Good night (1399) Bad night (932)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie. http://tfl.nu/je5q
  Replies (10) Good night (502) Bad night (1345)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot. http://tfl.nu/b8ei
  Replies (5) Good night (968) Bad night (411)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex? http://tfl.nu/agnf
  Replies (4) Good night (924) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months http://tfl.nu/j2ye
  Replies (0) Good night (339) Bad night (263)
• Favorite

  (417): View more from Missouri

  You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (417): You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc. http://tfl.nu/r22c
  Replies (1) Good night (534) Bad night (171)

Randomize