smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
