yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Randomize
