Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
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