I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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