I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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