hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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