If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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