he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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