i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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