I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize