How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
God, I missed his penis.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
