Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
