so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
