sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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