; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She bit a glass in half.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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