She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
