Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
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