I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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