We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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