i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
