Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
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