ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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