Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
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