Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
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