who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
