I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize