Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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