i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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