New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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