Texts From Last Night

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  (850): View more from Florida

  It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking

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  (850): It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking http://tfl.nu/828r
  Replies (27) Good night (1206) Bad night (2788)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.

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  (732): They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody. http://tfl.nu/blud
  Replies (55) Good night (11203) Bad night (1238)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA

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  (250): I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA http://tfl.nu/zqva
  Replies (38) Good night (6333) Bad night (848)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.

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  (734): I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather. http://tfl.nu/4j7n
  Replies (5) Good night (4501) Bad night (1106)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete

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  (484): maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete http://tfl.nu/m91r
  Replies (10) Good night (3971) Bad night (921)
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  (585): View more from New York

  My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.

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  (585): My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon. http://tfl.nu/q628
  Replies (8) Good night (3744) Bad night (1020)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.

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  (202): Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke. http://tfl.nu/as75
  Replies (8) Good night (1165) Bad night (4605)
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  (636): View more from Missouri

  The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.

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  (636): The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen. http://tfl.nu/0t44
  Replies (8) Good night (3053) Bad night (1114)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.

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  (304): You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib. http://tfl.nu/xjlf
  Replies (2) Good night (2574) Bad night (978)
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?

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  (519): I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen? http://tfl.nu/tjza
  Replies (20) Good night (6315) Bad night (1113)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.

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  (253): We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch. http://tfl.nu/tp65
  Replies (42) Good night (3900) Bad night (808)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?

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  (503): How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor? http://tfl.nu/eg7j
  Replies (6) Good night (1416) Bad night (1068)
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  (716): View more from New York

  he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."

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  (716): he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...." http://tfl.nu/2b45
  Replies (5) Good night (920) Bad night (2150)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.

  (510): View more from California

  I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.

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  (620): I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween. (510): I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween. http://tfl.nu/39pv
  Replies (3) Good night (828) Bad night (381)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint

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  (734): Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint http://tfl.nu/7p3b
  Replies (0) Good night (252) Bad night (146)

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