Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
