walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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