Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize