I swear she didn't look like that last week.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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