She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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