I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Randomize