So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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