lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
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