Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
