When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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