I want to stick my p in your. b.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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