if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Boobs are out for the taking
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
