Duck Duck Cougar?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize