Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(313): View more from Michigan

mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!

(1-313): View more from Michigan

it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...

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(313): mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up! (1-313): it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me... http://tfl.nu/s17x

Replies (13) Good night (836) Bad night (1892)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.

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(405): Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything. http://tfl.nu/pmpx

Replies (76) Good night (27896) Bad night (1792)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.

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(609): shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look. http://tfl.nu/n3uw

Replies (16) Good night (4909) Bad night (789)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day

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(508): I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day http://tfl.nu/qyf0

Replies (30) Good night (3844) Bad night (997)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?

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(601): hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow? http://tfl.nu/vvua

Replies (124) Good night (6328) Bad night (2360)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.

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(337): Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have. http://tfl.nu/wctv

Replies (30) Good night (1548) Bad night (5943)
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(714): View more from California

he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick

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(714): he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick http://tfl.nu/v3uh

Replies (14) Good night (4674) Bad night (927)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!

(860): View more from Connecticut

I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo

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(860): MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!! (860): I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo http://tfl.nu/vjys

Replies (14) Good night (8402) Bad night (963)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.

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(978): Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child. http://tfl.nu/fq2v

Replies (7) Good night (1076) Bad night (1726)
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(519): View more from Ontario

After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.

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(519): After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin. http://tfl.nu/r7ve

Replies (1) Good night (1343) Bad night (498)
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(386): View more from Florida

Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.

(904): View more from Florida

You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.

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(386): Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days. (904): You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal. http://tfl.nu/6thw

Replies (3) Good night (1175) Bad night (581)
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(970): View more from Colorado

I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.

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(970): I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation. http://tfl.nu/iw3q

Replies (6) Good night (1886) Bad night (538)
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(970): View more from Colorado

I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out

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(970): I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out http://tfl.nu/cs49

Replies (7) Good night (1350) Bad night (415)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him

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(843): Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him http://tfl.nu/dncw

Replies (4) Good night (1067) Bad night (409)
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(519): View more from Ontario

don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom

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(519): don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom http://tfl.nu/zs1y

Replies (3) Good night (742) Bad night (240)

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