I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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