He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I'm bleeding and have questions
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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